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Cocktails

Or how Tom Cruise got it just about spot on

by devnym

Cocktails exemplify the class act of a mature drink. Perched on a bar stool at your regular bar, sipping from the iconic V-shaped glass, your professional attitude lingers to the bouncer letting in the few elite.

Some love the strength, while others loathe the olive brine, there’s no denial for a promiscuous excursion into the night life with a simple cocktail.

Now a staple among classic American drinks, Cocktails originate back to England and are inspired by 18th century punch houses that served large bowls of mixed juices, spices, and alcohol. By definition, they are an iced drink mixed with liquor and flavoring.

Today, anything you order is a mixed drink. Cocktails continue to evolve over the years as taste buds change and social norms shift drinking habits.

The garnish decorating your glass identifies who you are as your lips kiss the rim. The toothpick pierced through an olive bathing on top shows you are old school; an original boss who knows their way around the block. Nobody will dare cross your boundaries. The orange peel twirl screams of flamboyant banter waiting to be heard.

Wild nights out on the town must start with a Cosmopolitan. It’s a Thursday night, deadlines have been met and it’s just one more work day ’til the grand ole weekend. Your gang’s all together sitting in the back both (the self proclaimed VIP section for locals and regulars) catching up on the latest dish; a reat rehash of the juicy group chat that you have sadly neglected for work. Sipping on the luscious pink delight, a bubbly kick from the Cosmo drives for a long night of dancing, heart felt talks in the dingy club bathroom, late night cravings for sidewalk hot dogs, and the relief of facing diving into your pillow as the sun comes up. While you remember the glory days of college keggers poured into dollar store red solo cups, those backyard shenanigans won’t cut it in the city’s nightlife, unless you dream of that 15 minutes of fame for being a fool on somebody’s Instagram feed. Stick with the Cosmo and you’ll fit right in with Carrie Bradshaw and Co.

For those lazy Sunday mornings as you lounge about your apartment, treat yourself to a little something. Contrary to the urban legends of Catholic school, The Bloody Mary glorifies the ideal breakfast for champions. While the tomato juice might be an offset, just think about the archaic food pyramid, we all need our dose of vegetables, don’t forget the celery which is a convent spoon. And look at our grandmothers! They’ve been drinking them since before we were a twinkle in our parents eye. Where else would they get their insightful wisdom?

Trying to seal the deal with the business proposition? Order the Manhattan! The simplicity depicts your knowledge of the rule book, but the bourbon’s punch stands your courage of originality. Show a little flare to your future business partner. They are here to expand their horizons, so don’t let them think your ambitions will dry up like a prune.

A sweet tooth’s dream swims within the Whiskey Sour plunge. Those days of clearing out the local candy shop after school with your piggy bank savings rush back with one sugary sip bumping the blood through your veins. A sugar fix entices a grand ole time from this gracious plunge. On your second round, change it up for a Mudslide. Feel the nostalgia of chasing the ice cream truck which now resembles your expedition towards success. If people give you a shit eating grin of a side eye, raise your glass and toast them for being unhappy with their generic lives.

With a wretched winter on the brink, most of us are fleeing to the beaches for a sun dazed break from the office. Soaking up the sun with your feet in the sand and the hottest bestseller, accompany your self care with a classic Margarita. The crisp taste of sugar rushes the tequila straight for the salty kick. Ironically, your first Margarita might have been on the beach, probably a watered down swig from that Spring Break that everybody loves to forget. Sit back and let the water rush over.

Looking forward to snuggling by the fire as the snow falls, a minty Mojito fits right into the yuletide spirit. Fresh mint leaves mixed with lime, rum, and club soda will go down like water, so make sure to hydrate yourself before slipping into your Uber.

Novices, don’t be alarmed by the overwhelming options for concocting your martini. Just breathe and remember you are a professional! If gin brings flashbacks to your horrendous karaoke skills at last years office Halloween party or vodka churns your stomach ever since your best friend’s wedding, choose wisely and limit yourself. Drinking in moderation is a healthy life hack! A dry martini asks for less vermouth. If you want the total opposite, order it wet. Not sure on your relationship with vermouth. Go half and half by asking for it perfect. Ice can make or break your booze. If you want a smooth sip, make sure the bartender stirs the martini. This process places the alcohol in a cocktail shaker with ice and stirred for about 30 seconds. If you live life on the edge, get it shaken! The bartender shakes it up with ice before pouring your glass. Trying to give off a fun vibe ala Will and Grace’s Karen Walker, have it straight up for that iconic martini glass. Wanna swig it back and go for another? Poured over ice, on the rocks fits perfect in the palm of your hand.

In a world divided, the bar is a rare space where many come together for an escape. If the direct deposit slid right into your account that day, buy a round for those at the bar. Karma will come back plenty. Maybe the owner will put another round on the house or you might spark a conversation with a new found friend.

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